Perseverance: Finding the Very Best in Us, Part I

March 16, 2026

Tim Lineaweaver, Author

Tom O'Connor, Publisher

Whittled to a Nub

When I was younger, trauma stripped me of the ability to believe in myself. Constant verbal abuse ground my self-esteem to the nub. I always assumed I'd fail at even the simplest tasks. My father's pet name for me was "Freddy Fuck Up." Consequently, I lacked "frustration tolerance." Minor setbacks or reversals overwhelmed me and led to self-doubt and anger. Usually, I'd quit before making a reasonable effort of faith.

I lacked perseverance, the ability to see things through. Perseverance is defined as: "steadfastly continuing in faith, and good works despite trials, difficulty, or opposition leading to character development." I certainly was not "steadfast." I didn't understand that failure is an entirely normal part of learning and should be expected.

Anyone who has had success will tell you that they initially faced rejection, opposition, and botched early attempts. They maintained their focus, commitment, and discipline and allowed themselves to learn from their mistakes. They stuck with it and overcame it. Persistence and resilience enabled success.

Swirling Down the Drain

When I was twenty-eight, I woke one morning with a pounding hangover and was horrified by my drunken behavior in front of family and friends at my daughter's christening. My untreated trauma and addictions had detonated my life. I was broke, soon to be divorced, and had no viable career other than tending bar, something I loved when younger but had grown tired of. I'd lost my self-respect and dignity and had no answers to how to lead a healthy life.

Read: Sobriety Without Healing: Why Abstinence Falls Short

Accepting Help and Becoming a Finisher

I finally accepted that I needed help. This realization was the beginning of developing a mindset that would lead me to a better life. I realized I didn't have the answers and would need to step outside my comfort zone to get them. It was counterintuitive to open up to a stranger about my problems, but I was desperate. I began therapy and learned that trauma was the engine driving my need to self-medicate. This enabled me to cultivate self-compassion rather than self-loathing. I knew that as long as my addictions continued unabated, I would not, could not have a decent life. I went to an inpatient treatment program, and for the first time in a long time, I finished. When I got home, I invested myself completely in recovery.

Initially, I wasn't confident I could stay clean and sober. Growing up in an alcoholic home, spending my time dealing and using drugs with others similarly inclined was all I knew. My therapist encouraged me to attend meetings daily, therapy and group therapy weekly, and to dedicate my time to activities related to my recovery. Despite monstrous cravings, deep depression, and spikes of anxiety, I stayed clean. My therapist praised my efforts and encouraged me to move forward. She was my champion, and I wanted to live up to her expectations. It felt strange for someone to see good in me. Although the first year was a pitched battle, the clouds parted after that, and confidence grew. I'd persevered and for the first time felt pride in my accomplishment.

If I could manage to stay clean and sober, what other challenges could I tackle? What other elements did I need to live a healthy and meaningful life?

In Part II, I discuss other challenges I took on to improve my life and offer practical tips to help readers develop resilience and perseverance in their own lives.

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Tim Lineaweaver is on our Vital Voyage Blog Editorial Advisory Board and one of our esteemed subject matter experts. He is also a frequent author on our Blog. To learn more, please visit Tim's website at https://www.timlineaweaver.com/

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